Child Training Tuesdays- Walking the Walk

I've been thinking for a few days about what aspect of child training did I want to discuss today. I just couldn't make a decision. Then it hit me this morning as I was traveling to the tennis courts for my children's lessons. We can talk to our kids, discipline our kids, pray for our kids, preach to our kids, take them to church, read them good books....etc. There are so many things that we can do to train our children in the way they should go. But, what happens if we ourselves are not modeling the attributes that we want to see in our children? This is so very important. We all have faults and things that we struggle with in our lives. We all have areas that we want to see our children do better in because we know how that negative aspect complicates our own lives. However, if you are always telling your children to do something better, or if they know that the Bible says something, but they know that their parents aren't doing it...then we become hypocrites.

Now, I personally believe that because we all struggle in some areas, that we cannot avoid sometimes being a hypocrite with our children. It doesn't make sense to sit back and watch your child make mistakes, and not do anything about it simply because you don't have complete control over that in your life either. What I believe is of utmost importance in this area is to be real and upfront with your children, first off, and then be working. I think if our children know that we struggle with something in our own lives, but that we are working on making it better, then they will not see us as hypocrites, but will understand that sin needs to be recognized, repented of, and then worked on.

This aspect of training applies to every area of our lives. Do we expect our children to read their bible every day, but we are not doing it. Do we expect them to eat healthy, but we sneak around eating junk food all the time? Do we tell them to control their temper with one another, but then they see mommy and daddy having a blowout with each other, or perhaps with someone else. Or, do we blow up at them when they push us to that limit? These are all areas that we can become hypocrites, if, we do not recognize them in our own lives, repent, be upfront about it with them, and then show them what we are doing to work on these areas in our own lives.

I would love to hear thoughts from other parents on this aspect of training. What are some other ways you can think of that we should be mindful that we are not being hypocrites with our children?

It seems to me that Jesus was most upset with those that were hypocrites. And that Bible is also clear that we are not to provoke our children to wrath. So, with those things in mind...how can we do our best in making sure that our children are learning from us how to better love and serve him, and not to turn away from him because they have not learned how to truly walk the walk? Please share your thoughts with me on this matter, so that we can all encourage one another in this area.

I Heart Faces Kids- Feet Week

This week at I Heart Faces, it's feet week. This picture I call Little Feet on the Go. This is my little Elias. I have always loved this picture and how his little feet are taking him to big places. Although the picture doesn't focus completely on his feet, I am always drawn to his little feet when I look at the picture. His little feet are getting bigger now....it's so sad!

Be sure to click on the I Heart Faces above for more feet!

Loving Your Husband Friday- Stand By Me

I love my husband today because he loves me enough to want to help me make things right. When I do or say something that causes hurt or offense, even if I did not intend it that way, he gently helps me to see how I could have done better. He does not get angry with me, even if I have done something that reflected badly on him. He is willing to listen and understand that my intentions were good, and he looks at my intentioins, not on the negative action. He gives me the benefit of the doubt, because he knows me, and wants me to be the best person I can be. He's a great husband for this. I've been very thankful for him this week, in being so understanding, when I have had one of those kind of weeks where it seemed even my best intentions ended up coming out the wrong way!

And even better, in the past when I have said or done something, and my intentions were not good, he is always willing to forgive, because he understands that we all fall short, and we all will do things to let each other down. I only hope that I do as good a job at this as he does!

Hopefully next week will be better, and he can only be proud to say that I am his wife, the same way that I am proud that he is my husband!

Please Join Shannon for more Loving Your Husband today, and pray for the marriages of others!

Friend Makin' Monday- Favorite Things

The topic for this weeks Friend Makin Monday is favorite things. Now, I'm already starting out on a bad footing here, because I see so many others have included neat pictures to go with their list of their favorite things. As much as I would love to find pictures to go with all of my favorite things, I could likely get another load of laundry done, and vaccuum the living room and feed the baby in the time it would take me to do all of that. So, I'll try to be descriptive, so that you can close your eyes and envision what I am talking about. So, here are my 5 to 10 favorite things.

1. Sandals....yes you heard me right. I think sandals are one of the best things ever invented. If you know me, you know that I would go barefoot all the time if possible. Who wants to be bothered with socks and tying shoes and all of that? My feet are rebellious, and long to be free. Now, since it isn't practical to go barefoot all the time, everywhere, then sandals are the wonderful compromise. I also wish that my children could wear sandals all year long. How, how much easier life would be. I look forward to summer for the simple fact of sandals weather. Ok, everyone, throw on your sandals/crocs, and let's go! Sooo easy! Give me a good pair of Birkenstock sandals, and weather warm enough to wear them and I am happy!
2. Blueberries....ahh...one of God's greatest creations. I'm thinking alot about blueberries as I am thinking next week, we are going to head up to our blueberrie place (the one we go to every year), and get about 30 pounds of blueberries. MMM....just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Delicious and nutritious, you can't beat that can you. Not to mention all the berries that I will freeze, that will supply us with blueberry pancakes, blueberry muffins, blueberry smoothies, and blueberry pie for the whole winter. I personally never tire of blueberries, and my kids love them too!
3. My MP3 player! I go crazy when my player loses it's charge. I like to listen to my own music while I am doing my chores. I've been a music junkie my whole life, and I think and MP3 player is one of the best inventions. Gone are the days when I had to fast forward through songs I don't like. Now, I can just put the songs I like on there, and I'm good to go. Love it!
4. Little House on the Prairie. Ok, this sounds silly, but I love Little House on the Prairie. I love the books, I love the show (except the last season or two kind of went downhill). I can sit down and watch episodes with my kids, and it is entertaining, but there is always something to teach them something valuable about History, or character.
5. Chocolate...ok, I can't talk about things that are my favorite without mentioning chocolate.
6. Lake Michigan. I love Lake Michigan. I have lived within an hour of the Lake my whole life, and I would rather go to Lake Michigan than the ocean any time. With Lake Michigan, it's so big, that you get the benefits, and feel of the ocean without all the irritating things about the ocean (salt water, sharks, jelly fish, crabs). Now, granted it might not always be as warm as the ocean, but the trade off works for me. There are also so many wonderful small towns on the coasts of Lake Michigan, that you could spend days just going up and down the coast, and have a whole vacation right there.
7. The Bumbo seat. I got one of these from a friend when my Lily was just learning to sit up, and I have loved it. I use it to feed the babies there baby food, when it is too cumbersome to use a high chair for them yet. It also helps them learn to sit up on their own, and balance. I am now using it with Donna, and it works so well for me to sit in my recliner, feed her some bottle, and then sit her little seat on the foot stool of my recliner, and then feed her some food, then back to the bottle. Those were a great invention.

So, these are 7 of my favorite things. I look forward to hearing more from others. Sorry, no pictures! Have a great day, and head over to Dandelion Wishes today for more Friend Making Monday.

At The Well- Living in the Spirit

How can you react when someone tries to undermine you as a parent or encourages something with your children that you do not agree with? Do you get mad or angry like a momma bear? (I used to.) How can you better react and still stay in the Spirit?

What ways can we rebuke un-Godliness and still be loving? Maybe it is a display of an un-Godly relationship or public drinking or something else that you have taught your children displeases the Lord?

How do you react when your small child asks a family member who is doing something wrong why they do that? Do you hush the child or make excuses? Is your reaction understandable to the child and in the Spirit?

These are the good questions being posed by Penny At the Well today. Head over there to see her entire post.

I've been pondering these questions this morning, as I've been doing my laundry and other chores.

To understand how to respond to anything in the Spirit, we need to think about what the Bible says about such matters. We need to think about what the Bible says in regards to the words that we would use with others, and how we should use them. Psalms 19 :14 says, "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer." Proverbs 15:1 tells us that "A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger." Verse 4 then tells us that " A soothing tongue is a tree of life...", and Ephesians 4:29-32 is very clear..."Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you with all malice. Be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ has also forgiven you."

I think these verses make it pretty clear as to how we should address the actions of others that we might encounter, and how we can teach our children to respond to others as well.

One thing that I think we all need to remember also is that our children need to first be very grounded in the word of God, and understand what is sin, and what is not. Then, I feel, that we need to help our children see that the unbeliever cannot be held to the same standards as the believer. We teach our children that there is a different standard. An unbeliever does not need us to point out sin in their lives, without also pointing out that everyone sins, and that there is a Savior who died to save them from their sins. If our children understand that compassion for the lost, and a genuine desire to see them come to true repentance, should supercede our desire to change their behavior, they will have a better picture of what Christ came to do for all of us. It is our job as Christian parents, not just to teach our children what is right and what is wrong in God's eyes, but also to teach them that mixed with this abhorrance for what is wrong, there needs to be a compassion for the lost, and the weaker brothers and sisters in Christ. If I, as a mother, approach someone about what I perceive as sin, with anger, and malice, then I have just slapped the gospel in the face. Christ came to seek and to save the lost. He loved, he served, and he made the ultimate sacrifice for our sins. We know that Christ was not silent when it came to pointing out sins. We need to carefully remember in front of our children, what sins he was most vocal about. It was the sin of hypocrisy. The sins of the pharisees, who took it upon themselves to point out how others were sinners, and they were perfect, because they kept the law. This is what we need to be careful of.

Our words to others, should always be gentle, kind, seasoned with salt, well chosen, and used, only when absolutely needed. The words we choose when responding to someone who has wronged us or our children, should always be equal to the words of our savior, filled with compassion and concern for their hearts, not just their actions. I think this is one of the most important lessons that we can teach our kids. If they are grounded in the word, they will know sin when they see it, but how will we model their responses to it? If they have parents that can only accuse, and never show kindness, love or compassion, then we are teaching them to be like the pharisees.

Our children,in their innocence, will always have questions for someone who they see doing wrong. I think it's ok to allow them to ask the tough questions, if they can do it in a fashion that does not insult or tear down. A very young child, will often sound offensive, because they do not yet understand how to use words of compassion, but I think others also understand, and the woords of that little one with high standards might just make them think about their actions. Children can be taught by example how to mix their "rebuke" with compassion and kindness, and when is an appropriate time to use them. Behind the scenes it is most important that we are continually having dialogue with our children, not about what pleases us, or makes us mad, but what pleases our savior, and what doesn't. We can be very vocal about what we see in the world that is wrong, and sinful, and still be vocal in our compassion for the people themselves, and our desire to show mercy and love to them. We should teach our children to hate sin, but also to love the sinner.

I have many other thoughts on this matter, but not enough to time right now to get them all verbalised. If anyone has any further thoughts on the matter, I would love to hear them. God's blessings to all the parents out there who, like myself, are plugging away, and trying to teach our children what God desires in all our lives.

I Heart Faces Pets Edition

These are our outside pets for the summer. These baby birds were born a few weeks ago in our pear tree. They were just waiting for mama to come feed them!

Head over to I Heart Faces for more pet pictures.

I Heart Faces Kids- Sports in Action

This week's theme is sports in action. I love this picture of my three oldest boys playing football. The little brother's are so obviously enjoying "taking down" their older brother. They are taking it very seriously. Owen is so obviously not enjoying it! There is a lot of emotion in this picture!

Head on over to I Heart Faces to see more sports in action pics.